Good grief. I have not cried much this year about this being Will's senior year. I have tried really hard to just smile and not think too much about it. I just tell myself that I can cry later and put it off. Yesterday I was in Walmart and they had coffee pots on sale and towels at a really good price. So I bought Will a coffee pot and some towels for college. I have a friend that already has her child EVERYTHING she will need for college. I was feeling like a bad mother, but I am just ignoring the upcoming leaving home thing.
Anyway, I was in the line checking out and it just hit me looking at that coffee pot. It was all I could do not to break down and bawl like a baby right there in Walmart. I guess the checker could sense my discomfort and she smiled nicely at me. I said, I have been holding it all in about my child leaving home and this stupid coffee pot has made me cry. She was about 20 years old. She just kind of looked at me pitifully and shook her head. ( I hope that she has 10 kids some day and has to buy 10 coffee pots for each of them.) Anyway, that was a moment yesterday that gave me a look into how I am going to feel 5 months from now. Once again, God, be near and hold my heart tightly.