Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Coffee maker and my tears

Good grief. I have not cried much this year about this being Will's senior year. I have tried really hard to just smile and not think too much about it. I just tell myself that I can cry later and put it off. Yesterday I was in Walmart and they had coffee pots on sale and towels at a really good price. So I bought Will a coffee pot and some towels for college. I have a friend that already has her child EVERYTHING she will need for college. I was feeling like a bad mother, but I am just ignoring the upcoming leaving home thing.

Anyway, I was in the line checking out and it just hit me looking at that coffee pot. It was all I could do not to break down and bawl like a baby right there in Walmart. I guess the checker could sense my discomfort and she smiled nicely at me. I said, I have been holding it all in about my child leaving home and this stupid coffee pot has made me cry. She was about 20 years old. She just kind of looked at me pitifully and shook her head. ( I hope that she has 10 kids some day and has to buy 10 coffee pots for each of them.) Anyway, that was a moment yesterday that gave me a look into how I am going to feel 5 months from now. Once again, God, be near and hold my heart tightly.

4 comments:

Melinda said...

If it makes you feel any better, your coffee pot story made me tear-up a little bit...and I am 14 years away from having to experince it for myself. : )

I will be praying for you in the coming months. I can only imagine how hard this must be.

Amy said...

Melinda: Thank you! It is just so hard to believe that it is here. Astounding how fast it has gone. I know it is the right thing for them to move on in life but it is hard. I keep telling myself that I would not want him to want to just stay home and never leave! That would not be good. ha. Have a good day! Amy

Debbie said...

I have two leaving for college in the fall! I am right there with you. Come over and we will have a good cry together.

Cow Pies & Mud Pies said...

I'll be praying for you as you prepare to send your son to college...I can't imagine. Have a good cry, it's OK!