Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Thoughts...they don't come easy...

Sounds a little trite? It does to me too, but it is what God is asking us to do. Give Him our worries and trust Him to handle them.

Do you ever get to a point and wonder how you got there? I mean in your life or mind. Our last year has been a whirlwind of activity. I feel like for at least over 6 or 8 months now I just have not had anything to say or maybe it is just that I do not know how to write about life right now. Sometimes there is just too much going on to process and to write it down and experiencing the emotion of it is just too hard maybe. It's an overload of way too many big happenings in our life or something, combined with not feeling too good. Who knows, but all I can say is I am sorry for the lack of much inspiring and helpful but I thank you for still coming by.

Lately I have wondered what this blog is supposed to be. I have loved having somewhere to write down my heart, and post photos, but as I have said lately, my mind has seemed blank. I think it is because of moving away from the familiar and friends, having a parent pass away, health problems, a child going to college, a child about to move out and go to college, anticipating the empty nest, stress of paying for college, getting used to living somewhere new even if it is familiar. Just a few stressful and eventful things has kind of made me feel I am on autopilot.

I know I sound like I am whining but I really am not. I am just trying to get a handle on my mind and process a little. I feel so strongly that your health and feelings in your body are tied so tightly to the stress in your life. I am a worrier. It is hard for me to confess that because I have fought it so hard. My Dad recently told me that I just had to let go of worry. Funny, I feel like I do let go of worry, but it is like my body does not let go even when my mind seems too. I know that God can help me overcome worry and stress in my body and mind. I am praying He will continue to bring me closer to where I am supposed to be in this journey. Completely laying worries at His feet.

Luke 12: 22 & 23
Then Jesus said to His disciples: "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes."

Of course, food and clothing are insignificant compared to dealing with the loss of a parent and your kids moving to college or even moving and leaving friends. But, I think God means for us to lay in all down, no matter what. If I can't change it by worrying then I should just pray and let it go. I am learning. It takes me a while. For right now in this moment though, I am free of it. Thank you Father for taking my anxiety and my fears and worries. There is nothing that you can't handle and You tell me that there is nothing that I can't handle with you in control. Thank you.

I did get the results back from an MRI that was done on Monday. My doctor was looking for possibly MS because of some weird central nervous system problems I am having. Praise the Lord no MS showed up. What they did see was a herniated disk and a bulging disk in my neck. He thinks these could be causing some of the strange electrical problems I am feeling in my body. I am thankful. I will go to a neurologist in August to look at all of this further. Thank you for your prayers.

Now...on to a happier remembrance. We did go back to Red River for the family encampment this year. It was wonderful to be there. We always see lots of family and great friends. It is a blessing.

Picture of our condo. grounds from our balcony. So peaceful and so very tranquil.
The only picture I got inside the tent. Lots of people there. I heard there were a little over 1500 people attending.
Summer chair lifts were going strong. Such a beautiful place. I know three pictures is not much, but I was mostly resting on this trip. Blessings on your day!

Don't worry, be happy.

1 comment:

Candie said...

I know I posted sometime ago about feeling as though I was writing "empty" posts. I remember you writing back a very encouraging comment. I appreciate you sharing the very real experiences that occupy your mind - your boys leaving, your loss, moving - each one of those experiences can be an all cosuming experience...but it seems God has blessed you by having each one follow the tail of the other. Maybe having all three activities happen back to back will help you handle the other experience in a better way compared to having each experience as isolated events. I don't know - but God laid it on my heart to write that. I feel I could discuss the idea in more detail - but maybe only writing the "heart" of what I wanted to explain will allow you to interpret it just for you.

MS has greatly affected my husband's family. I'm so happy to hear that was not the result of your testing.
Much love and prayers -