A Little Facebook Breakup...
This pic above was me. Not the girl, but the guy. My husband was the one who would get agitated with me again and again. We have been pretty upfront about no phones while eating together, during worship, when visiting with guests, while driving, etc. but outside of those times I did not have much self control.
Facebook was the draw most of the time. Instagram and Twitter were interesting but not like zoning out of the present and into facebook. (Notice I refuse to capitalize facebook when I don't have to. Can't give it that power. wink. wink.) Truly though, it was running my world but I just would not admit it and really did not even notice what it was doing. I enjoyed keeping up with friends, reading foodie posts, getting health tips and getting outraged at political stuff. (No, not really.) I started to feed on the sensationalism and crazy stories and noticed I would be upset about things that "might" happen and alarmed at all the political speak. Even though I hated how people treated each other, it was sadly interesting to kind of watch it happen. The scrolling and scrolling was addicting to me.
The past 5 years or so I have been trying to train my mind, heart and schedule to be in the Word of God daily. Like I wrote about my husband in my last post, I have had his constant, quiet example for years of him studying in the mornings. I have done pretty good in making this standing appointment for quite some time but the facebook addiction was still ruling. I am thankful that I have a husband that loves me enough to tell me over and over (knowing I would be annoyed) that I had a problem. "Honey, you don't seem to be able to put your phone down." "Do you really have to be on facebook the first thing in the morning?" "You are always so stressed about things you cannot control after reading all of that stuff." Now, why in the world could I not curb my incredible desire to check into what was happening on facebook before I even poured my first cup of coffee or cracked open my Bible? I don't know, but most of the time, I couldn't. Pitiful. Believe me, sharing this is painful and is hurting my feelings, but it does feel good to be honest. I actually think I let the enemy that prowls around looking for someone to devour (1 Peter 5:8) maintain a stronghold through it in my mind and life for a long time. I know that sounds dramatic but I believe it is profoundly true.
God started to bring to mind all of the things I had been neglecting and the people I have looked through, and not at and the huge amounts of wasted time that I cannot get back. He showed me that my example of staring at my phone is a terrible pattern that my children and grandchild are seeing and will think is perfectly normal and carry on in their lives. He brought to mind all of the wonderful things I could be doing and dreaming about to further the Kingdom and to love people instead of being stressed out and comparing myself to other people constantly on social media and constantly picking up my phone to scroll to see what was happening. Basically, living by watching everyone else's lives and not living mine.
So, I finally decided to just take the facebook app off of my phone in January. It was hard at first, kind of like what I might imagine someone going totally off of sugar and feeling that they might die or some other addiction that makes you feel panicky not to have. But after about a week I realized I was free. In a way, I had my life back. I had my eyes opened to things I had neglected and I had better conversations with people and I was not stressed out like I used to be. I felt lighter and was moving more (not sitting all the time) and talking more and well...free. I still have a desktop computer that we use for work and I allow myself to look at facebook once a day but no scrolling is allowed. There are few pages I go to and people I to go directly to check on, but I have put a time limit on it.
I know I am not alone in this. I am afraid satan is using this fun tool (our phones) to isolate and anger and entertain us right out of our minds. God help us. God help me. I am thankful, even ecstatic about this little bit of facebook freedom for my heart and mind. Our phones and facebook and instagram and twitter and whatever else we use can be tools to glorify God and spread the great news of Jesus and I am so thankful for that. Let us keep an open mind and be on the lookout for how easily we can get lulled into letting these communication tools became a huge distraction and stronghold.
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.
Blessings! Amy
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